I got out of bed this morning and fell down I was so weak. I landed on my side and did not have the strength to prop myself up so I slowly turned myself over on my stomach and began to crawl to the nightlight. I don’t know why I was drawn to the nightlight but it became my universe. I knew I had to make it over to that nightlight if I wanted to survive. My voice would not respond to my urgent attempt to scream for help. All that came out were gurgling and scary gasping sounds so I tried to pull myself towards the nightlight by holding onto the leg of the nightstand but the nightstand wasn’t anchored and moved towards me. The jostling of the stand caused the lamp to fall on me which caused a sharp pain in my back where the angular, brass base landed dead center in the middle of my spine. The pain grew quickly to become unbearable but my attention to it was interrupted by the first eardrum-pounding howl.
Only kidding.
I had a very normal morning. I went to the gym and did 20 minutes of low-scale cardio work. I did not sweat which leads me to believe that I’m not drinking enough water. That will be a priority today. I usually drink about six cups of water but that is probably not enough when water is all that I’m putting in my stomach.
I’m not hungry. Eating is more of a memory now and I try not to think about it because it would be very appealing to put something tasty in my mouth. It tastes terrible in there and I think my tongues is getting bored with just my teeth and the roof of my mouth.
So it’s the idea of food that’s luring me, not the necessity of it. I could easily allow the idea of eating to overwhelm my disciplined thought process and drive me to the supermarket but it would be the thought process doing the driving not the physical or instinctual necessity.
That necessity will eventually arrive so I should try to stay in tune with my ability to recognize it when it does. I guess it will be in the form of weakness or overwhelming craving or something like that.
So I am on my way into the office to start my day . . .
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